The Truth Behind the Kiss He Plants on Your Forehead
Tonight as James left my Johannesburg apartment, cupping my face in his big soft hands, he said “goodnight" and kissed me gently on the forehead before disappearing into the night. As I watched him leave, I couldn’t help but wonder what that kiss meant.
Kissing is a natural gesture of human affection. A kiss can mean many things. It could mean I love you. It could mean sexual desire, reverence, or even hello (i.e. a peck “hello” or “goodbye”). Most of us have experienced or explored these types of kisses in all different situations. A kiss can tell us so many silent truths about the person you are with or the relationship you hold together. Still, that kiss on the forehead baffled me . . . what exactly did it mean? What should I read into that gentle giant’s intimate kiss he left on my forehead?
To decipher the forehead kiss, I began to research the art of kissing and what each form of a kiss could suggest or portray. So, kiss after kiss, I went through the list and found the following through my own experience.
Types of Kisses
The (Sometimes Infamous) Peck on the Lips
This is a quick, innocent kiss, when two people kiss on the lips, smacking them together and making a (mwah) sound. This kind of kiss is usually used as a greeting, either a hello or a goodbye. It could also be a thank you when receiving a gift.
You could expect it from a friend, your granny, a parent, or other people in your life that you have a strong connection with. In these cases it is non-sexual, just a gesture of love and comfort in one another’s presence. If between partners, it could be a small gesture of love and affection. It's quick and brief, a signal confirming the love or intimate nature of your relationship together.
The Lingering Peck
I have a male friend who used to have a crush on me. One time when dropping him off at home after a night of heavy drinking and dancing, I leaned over to “peck him” a goodnight kiss (see above). According to him, I “lingered" and he tells me about it to this day.
I, however, have a very different explanation for this story and assure him every time he brings it up that I was drunk and stumbling a little to get back my starting position, that in fact if I had lingered, it was not so much me trying to show interest in him as it was me trying to get my bearings together.
Ah! The dangers of the lingering peck. A lingering peck is a tell-tale sign that the other party is romantically interested in you, longing for that kiss to last and move into the next kissing phase. The lingering peck is usually followed with a look into one another’s eyes, a little grin creeping up in the corner of the mouth, and maybe even a gentle exhale or nervous giggle. Your heart starts racing. It is a kiss of things to come. There is nothing innocent about the intentions of this kiss.
The French Kiss
The french kiss is “a kiss with tongue." It's when two people's tongues touch one another in a sensual sexual dual. It conjures up sexual desires, intimacy, and romantic ideals.
It can be seen as a form of affection in public, and behind closed doors as the act that accompanies love making. It usually takes place between partners who share the same feelings for one another, who are married, dating, or are the stereotypical friends with benefits, where french kissing comes hand-in-hand with love making.
There is no doubt that your body and mind will react to this sensual kissing in an erotic manner. A "kiss with the tongue" stimulates the partner's lips, tongue, and mouth, which are sensitive to the touch, sending signals to all your other erogenous zones.
The Forehead Kiss
Finally, the sensual kiss on the forehead. It’s easy to understand the other styles of kisses, because all we need to do is listen to our bodies and how they react in those circumstances. The light bulbs turn on as we experience each form of affection and we know how to place the gesture.
However, as James kissed my forehead, emotions and thoughts rushed through my head. I couldn't pinpoint the kiss. I felt comforted in the tenderness of his cupped hands and his lips pressed against my skin, a tenderness that could also be the adoration that a father or mother has for their child.
As you can imagine, this kind of thought was confusing. Was he building a wall between us with his A-frame stance? No, that didn't seem right. I threw out that idea within seconds because I knew he wasn't running away. Maybe he was hoping in some way to connect with me without coming across too strong? It wasn’t the kiss on the cheek, which is a dead giveaway that he just wants to be friends, but a sweet and comforting sign of protection.
But what did it all mean?!
I decided to ask a few male friends about their opinion on why he planted the kiss there. Below is what I found.
“
The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space.
— Marilyn MonroeWhat It Really Means When a Guy Kisses You on the Forehead
A forehead kiss is “a non-threatening form of affection," as long as it's from a lover’s point of view or someone you have been intimate with—not your grandma!
It’s the kiss that says, "I really care for you and I want to look after you and protect you." It means he feels comfort in being around you and with you, and it's a way of showing how much he cares without words (as men sometimes struggle to express themselves).
This kiss implies his respect for you, that he doesn’t only want you to feed his sexual appetite, but that he emotionally respects you and is there for you. I was asking my guy friends about this, and they laughed and told me that a kiss on the forehead is the closest thing to a kiss without having to put in too much effort, and that guys know it makes the girls melt.
I gave one friend a little slap on his arm as he said this. His laughter subsided and he said in all seriousness, "He likes you, he respects you, and he won’t be going anywhere else anytime soon.”
I sit back and have a flashback of James planting his lips on my forehead, my eyes closed and gentle smile peeking out of the corners of my mouth. We look into one another’s eyes, and I know it's true. He really does care for me.
As my friends get up from the table, one by one they leave a kiss on my forehead. These are my friends who love and adore me. It's the perfect kiss—on the forehead!
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